The question arises as to whether conviviality is confined to the privatised family meal or can it be achieved when eating out in company (family or otherwise)? Of course for the majority of the guests a dinner party is the equivalent of eating out even though it takes place in someone's home. But what about the situation in the neutral venue of an eatery.
Restaurants try to provide more than just food - a total eating experience - themed venue, specialist tastes. Eating out alone whilst often necessary is not popular. Whereas eating together at a venue is to a degree in some places (the USA in particular) the new family meal. Popular American TV programmes trade on this feature. The seminal role of the coffee shop 'Central Perk' in the hit show 'Friends' as the place where the group would meet share life set a trend which popularised the coffee shop in the UK.
In the series the 'Gilmour Girls' the coffee shop has become the local diner and the family are almost proud of the fact that they rarely eat at home. However there is a formal dinner party and the grandparents house every Friday night which seems to contrast the habits of the present generation with those of the previous one.
My thanks go to Beckie Pickering for the following article which was published on the BBC website and refers to the Fresh Expressions movement within the church. Mark Berry is mentioned heavily and he was the orginator of the Table Church idea in its current incarnation. The article may not say much that is new to the experienced Fresh Expressions practicioner but it show that the world outside the church is beginning to notice that new things are happening.
But however welcoming churches are, the conventional Sunday service won't appeal to everyone, and so the CofE, in association with the Methodists, also has a programme called Fresh Expressions aimed at finding new forms of church for those reluctant to set foot in a traditional building.
This can be a social event - meeting at someone's home to share a meal and to talk - or it can mean social work, getting out in the community to make connections.
"We think of it as our R&D department", says Archdeacon Jackson. "We want church to be a verb not a noun," is a favourite phrase from Fresh Expressions enthusiasts, who often talk of "emerging churches"
"The family meal and dinner table are potent symbols even metonymns (a substitute for) of the family itself. "
Deborah Lupton - Food, the Body and the Self London Sage 1996
The family meal is a practice through which we produce and reproduce human culture and through which we recogniser ourselves as belonging to a culture. The family meal can be defined in a broader way here than the Sunday lunch, so as not to exclude any part of society for financial or other reasons. For the middle class woman the family meal may symbolise love and care, whereas for the poor woman putting a meal on the table is more likely to be an assertion of survival.
De Vault argues that meals are a means of producing home and family. The legendary Oxo family of TV advertisement fame, evolved over time and then were finally dropped as not being realistic enough to speak to the modern household.
" The Oxo advert reinforced the importance of eating together." Nick Nairn
"Good food and good conversation matter. Solitary grazing is depressing." Bel Mooney
"When families stop eating together community is diminished...family without community... is the worst of all worlds. The contact, that thing which makes us learn to be human is missing."
Nigella Lawson - The family that eats together - The Observer 5th September 1999.
"The sharing of food is seen as indicative of a close relationship. Conversely when petitioning for divorce one of the indications of separation is that meals are no longer shared by marital partners. The sharing of food is therefore something that happens within family households and is an indication of their existence."
(Charles, N (1995), "Food and family ideology", in Jackson, S, Moores, S (Eds),The Politics of Domestic Consumption, Prentice-Hall/Harvester Wheatsheaf, Hemel Hempstead)
For Delia Smith the 'Proper Meal' becomes attached not only to ideas about tradition but also to our emotional and spiritual health. This is not simply about what one eats but how we eat - the 'Proper Meal' must take place at a table, shared and promotes sociability and conversation. For Smith this equates to home cooked Sunday lunch and is mirrored elsewhere in other texts and in the practice of the people.
"I have an instinct that perhaps our current preoccupation with healthy eating has eclipsed what I consider to be a very health-giving joy of more traditional cooking, of eating gathered round a table enjoying conversation, good food and good wine."
The table is an important piece of furniture in the Bible. There is much written about the tables in the tabernacle and the temple. Elijah had a small room in Shunnem, but a table was one of the pieces of furniture mentioned. Psalm 23 declares to God, “You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies”, David assured Jonathan that there would always be a place at his table for Jonathan and his family, Jesus was at table with Pharisees, lepers, disciples, women, and tax collectors. Tables are a big deal.
Isaiah the Prophet pointed to a table that was amazing. It is an eschatological table, a table that awaits us and is being prepared for us, but one at which we have yet to be seated. His promise was given to a people who were threatened with being overrun by one empire after another. It was to them that he pointed to Zion, the mountain of the Lord, and wrote these words found in Isaiah 25:6-8.
On this mountain the Lord of hosts will make for all peoples a feast of rich food, a feast of well-aged wines, of rich food filled with marrow, of well-aged wines strained clear. And he will destroy on this mountain the shroud that is cast over all peoples, the sheet that is spread over all nations; he will swallow up death forever. Then the Lord God will wipe away the tears from all faces, and the disgrace of his people he will take away from all the earth, for the Lord has spoken.
Recommendation: That congregations consider how the cell, congregation and celebration dimensions of being the Church might be applied locally.
Suggestion: We recommend the creation of 'fellowship groups'. These groups would be small enough to meet around a kitchen table. When the groups become larger than this it is envisaged they would split. The purpose of the groups would be to provide support and fellowship for our members. However, they would also be open to 'enquirers'. The meetings could take the format of a simple meal, during which news is shared; followed by a short act of worship (a performance could be supplied to give a starting point); followed by Bible study, or group discussion on another topic of interest. Once (or twice) a year groups could come together to share with each other.
This is one of the first questions people ask us about our community! It's usually followed by something like; "You're not some sort of cult are you?" While the name The Table may seem unusual, it simply serves as a metaphor of our values. While many churches select names that reflect their physical location (Tanner Street Church of God) or physical community (Springfield Community Church), we wanted to define ourselves by our values. At The Table, we want everything we do to be driven by one or all of our four Core Values: Authentic Community; Worship & Beauty; Truth & Meaning and a Missional Journey.
To us, a table serves as a beautiful metaphor of all of these values.
Authentic Community is about relationships. Time spent around a table, sipping coffee, telling stories, laughing, crying, sharing a meal...these are times of community. We want The Table to be such a community for ourselves, and for you. The Table is a place where you can know and be known, love and be loved.
Worship & Beauty is about contribution. As we gather around a table, we quickly discover each of our own unique stories and struggles and how these elements have molded and shaped us into the person we are today. We believe this to be true because the Bible tells us we are all image-bearers of God and that God has designed each of us to uniquely reflect Him. When each individual is living out their part of God's story in their unique way -- that is an act of worship, and it is beautiful. Therefore, it is our desire at The Table to see every person discover their own unique and individual God-given design and destiny as they learn to share it with us, the city, and ultimately, the world.
Truth & Meaning is about finding life. Day after day, we come to a table to get sustenance. We need strength, nourishment, and encouragement in order to thrive in this broken world. Just as we come to a physical table for physical life, we believe we all must come to a spiritual table to receive spiritual life. We want The Table to be just such a place, a place that gives life. The Table is a place where you can come to in order to find insight and companionship for your journey.
A Missional Journey is simply about reality. We aren’t meant to live out our days at a table, constantly eating and eating. In the same way, God certainly didn't design us to live out our lives in the church. He's called us to bring His message and His love to all peoples in all nations. We want The Table to be a place that equips and enables you to carry out the work of Christ in our world.
The term "table" is derived from a merger of French table and Old English tabele, ultimately from the Latin word tabula, "a board, plank, flat piece". In late Latin, tabula took over the meaning previously reserved to mensa (preserved in Spanish mesa"table"). In Old English, the word replaced bord for this meaning.
It is interesting that these latin words have appeared with other connotations.
Mensa - The high IQ society has taken its name from the idea of a round table where all members are equal. The church should of course foster the same ideals.
Tabula Rasa - Means a blank slate or piece of paper. The idea being that this is what we are before experience writes its story upon us. The idea of the table being blank or empty until filled by convivium appeals to me.
The picture shows a small Franciscan church , built in 1861, contains a slab of chalk rock (Mensa Christi) that according to a tradition was the rock on which Jesus ate with his disciples after rising from the dead.
Mark 16: 14: "Afterward he appeared unto the eleven as they sat at meat...".
There was a high incidence of communal meals during world war two. These events would have organised but informal with the whole family involved. I wonder whether this played a part in the development of the community spirit which was so prevalent at the time.
The incidence of communal meals at the beginning of the 21st century now tends towards the wedding reception. These are stylised and set and pretending to some ideal but ultimately unknowable standard. A very different event from their wartime predecessors.
"Meals require a table with a seating order and entail the restriction of movement. Thus a meal frames the gathering and effectively rules out certain simultaneous activities. The sharing of meal draws the boundaries of the symbolic and emotional existence of the family. Only certain very specific non-family members are permitted to cross these boundaries. In contrast drinks can be shared between a wider group of people. Drinks are for strangers, acquaintances, workmates and family. Meals are for family, close friends and honoured guests."
"Traditional societies are characterised by relatively low rates of social change. There may be in effect one traditional master menu, which co-incides with the boundaries of the alimentary totality.Modern and modernising societies with more rapid raates of social change will tend towards 'menu pluralism' where many alternative schemes to structure food choice and eating patterns are on offer. Pluralism can be seen as having some connections with the concept of postmodernity"
(Sociology on the Menu - Alan Beardsworth and Teresa Keil. 1997)
By the late 20th/early 21st Century the idea of feasting seems no longer pertinent. The table retaining only a much diminished meaning. The church being one of the few organisations that can still claim its centrality via the Mass or Holy Communion.
Mostly the table survives as a relic from another age, living in what might be decsribed as a post table society. The larger gathering are now rare. Drinking has overtaken food as the metier of this type of gathering. The practice of the shared meal is almost gone, replaced by grazing and the TV dinner. The table no longer plays the crucial role in culture it once did in the evolution of western society.
In it with this background that I am seeking to re-establish value and practice by developing the concept of Table Church in my local community. Everytime we meet and eat together a deeper bond is formed that by any other activity. It is this that I want work out into something that includes worship, discipleship and mission.
At last I have finally connected with all of the other MA student blogs. For the longest time I could not remember where the list was and so I gave up looking and then what do you know but it came to me that it was bound to be in the last place I would look - on the computer under MEC3 Pioneer Placement! At least now I shall be able to see what everyone else has been upto.
Revolutionary France saw the advent of the fraternal meal - often eaten out of doors, with anyone passing by being able to be invited to join in. This period also saw the development of the restaurant in France and the Coffee House in England.
The French experience was more in line with the Roman Convivium with the focus fixed on the delight in sharing of food together.The English version was more like the Greek Symposium because it centred not so much on the food but on conversation and even business
The 1680's saw the habit of drinking tea become widespread. This led to the manufacture of a special table. By the 18th Century in the new genre of the conversation piece, tea came to symbolise elegant sociability, when family and friends came together around a table replete with silver teapot and caddy with porcelain dishes for drinking. The whole idea of ceremony was important because it meant giving time to the act of being together. In China this became distinct in the famous 'Tea Ceremony'. THe passage of time seems to convey importance even with the drinking of simple cup of tea. A time and place and being in company were held to be the important elements.
In Elizabethan England, the Queen rarely ate with her subjects, however the ceremonies remained even though she was not present. This was somewhat extraordinary in a country where there were no longer altars nor Christ's presence in bread and wine. It is possible that the royal table and meal had become substitues for the Mass.
It is interesting that the lack of the actual presence of the host did not detract from the need to perform the rituals of the meal. The fact that presence of Christ at his supper is not corporeal has not detracted from the need for the ritual that surrounds it. The meal and its eucharistic equivilent have much to say to each other.
Marsilio Ficino (1433-99) a Florentine humanist philosopher remarks in his book 'De Sufficienta'
"Only the meal (convivium) embraces all the parts of man, for... it restores the limbs, renews the humours, revives the mind, refreshes the senses and sharpens reason."
So it seems by this period that dining at table was conceived of as a microcosm of the good society in which social relationships were forged, ideas exchanged in a civilised fashion and mutual respect established. These humanist thinkers would constantly remind their readers that the word 'Convivium' derives from'Conviviere'meaning to live together.
In the Mediaeval Period the simple act of eating was transmuted into and expression of sensual art. The decor of the setting for the meal was a feast for the eye as was the amazing arrangement of the food. The nose appreciated the delicate scent of the perfumed water for hand washing, which also satified the sense of touch. The ear delighted in the music played throughout the experience and of course the foood itself satisfied the sense of taste.
Bartolomeno Platina who was the prefect of the Vatican library interestingly argued that the sensous pleasure gained through the consumption of food could under the right circumstances been seen as honest and honourable
At the Burgundian court in the Middle Ages, every meal became a spectacle whose resemblance at times to the liturgy of the Mass cannot of been co-incidental. Even the canopy which was erected over the chief guests actually had its origins in the rituals of the church.
"As far as possible constrain yourself to eat before your people for this shall bring great honour and benefit to you." Robert Grosseteste - Bishop of Lincoln c.1240AD
The Bishop believed that public eating was very important for those in authority because the common meal when constantly re-enacted played a crucial role in maintaining the harmony and order of the household.
After a few days of well earned rest I am back to the wonderful world of blogging. During my absence much time has been spent in libraries with my nose in a book and in a variety of discussions on the subject of Table Church. So there should be plenty of new material for you to read, which I will be posting over the next few days.
The Table in the medieval world exemplified the world denying vs world affirming divide so prevalent at the time. The communal meal shared by the monks was austere in character and was meant to feed the spirit more than the body. Whereas the the secular feast in the hall focused on the deployment of power - it mattered if you were seen to have been be invited. This element was to be seen in the conviviums and symposiums of the ancient world. Surely the whole idea of the feast should be to feed both body and soul without resort to excess or prejudice
What must strike the contemporary observer about theconviviumin its restrained form, devoid of the later decadent excesses, is the modernity of so much about it — its order, its culinary excellence, its sense of style and ceremony, to say nothing of its delight in all the appurtenances of civilised living: conversation and music, the reading of prose and poetry, what in effect often amounted to a cabaret attached to a meal — what we would now call dinner-theatre.
But that modernity was underpinned by a vast substructure of slavery, which was in turn based upon brutality, violence and every form of cruel subjection. At no other period in the history of eating does such a startling and frightening polarity occur.
At least that is the way the old Republican convivia were viewed in retrospect, as pleasant classless affairs where social barriers were lowered and normal conventions relaxed, with inferiors allowed to indulge freely in sharp wit without fear of recrimination.
'I serve the same to everyone, for when I invite guests it is for a meal, not to make class distinctions,'wrote the younger Pliny. 'I have brought them as equals to the same table, so I give them the same treatment in everything.'
The English language includes the wordconvivial, which is based on the Latin convivium for a feast or banquet (or, more broadly, a living together, from con + vivo).
Although these occasions were often the occasion for excess, the were seen as being one of the cornerstones of civilisation. There were often a gathering of equals, which demonstrated the commonality of the group.
In Greece eating and drinking together was also an expression of equality - equality, that is, between members of a distinct group sharing the same values, and also political power. The meal would always follow the same format, first there would be a blood sacrifice followed by eating and finally drinking. This is the origin of the practice of the women retiring and the men remaining with the port etc. It was at this point in the evening that the hard talking would begin. This was called the symposium (the Greek verb sympotein means "to drink together"). It was here that poetry, prose, intellectual and philosophical discussions would occur.
The importance of meeting around a table for food and conversation clearly has its origins in the earliest days of human civilisation. The implication of sharing of life as equals and the relaxed ambiance of the meal permits the initiation of discussion on the great subjects of existence. The Table Church idea is to bring together in synthsesis (from the Greek meaning to "place with") something of the convivium and the symposium to create an experience of living and learning together for a missional exisitence.
'The Mediterranean tradition of eating is that a range of small dishes are placed on the table and shared by everyone. This is a reminder of the days when everyone would eat from the same pot.'
Elisabeth Luard (Saffron and Sunshine)
Informal meals invoke a sense of conviviality and friendship which has ancient roots. Those who eat the same food, smell right to each other; it all goes back to the cave. This informalization can be characterised in terms of the emerging but also in terms of the past.
CasWouters (Formalization and Informalization)
These quotes are helpful in creating an understanding of the nature of the meal and its significance in human interaction.
Formality and informality at the table - from the formal dinner to the DIY dinner party and TV dinner, there are parallels with the varieties available in styles of worship from those based in formal ritual to those which seem to be a free for all.
There are also some interesting gender ideas here. In the absence of servants it is the hostess who has the most significant role (even the male host may be the head of the table). it is the role of the hostess to ensure that her guests feel comfortable, that receive the meal and that any difficult moments in the conversation are quickly re-directed. This is not unlike the church where although men may aspire to headship, the significant activities are undertaken by the women, who form the better part of the congregation.
Mel Byers in the book 'The Best Chairs,Tables,Lights' suggests that there are 5 basic types of tables.
1. For dining 2. For work (desk etc.) 3. For playing games (cards, roulette) 4. For handy convenience (coffee, bedside etc.) 5. For use whilst standing (hunt, buffet)
This made me think because I had not considered the fact that tables could be charactised by their different functions - it is obvious once you have thought about it.Interestingly the communion table does not seem to figure in this categorisation.I suppose it might be thought of as appearing in a number of the categories but I feel that is actually another thing all together. The mediaeval term was 'Goddes Board' implies dining but aslo that it is not our table but his and therefore has ritual significance (as they always say on time team).
'The archetype of a table is obvious and simple. The technology employed to produce a table for a king is the same as that used by, for example, the Shakers.'
'We might think of the present as an age of confrontation between objects that originated as archetypes and objects that originated in dematerialized forms. To the extent that dematerialization follows technology's vertiginous progress, archetypes are beginning to look more and more archaic. And as the real is erased and we are swept into the virtual, our need for the presence of the archaic is becoming more urgent. A desire to re-establish a balance between the two has created the need for tangible validation of our existence in the world in which we live.'
SylvainDubuisson quoted in 'Best Chairs, Tables, Lights'
Again a comment from a book on furniture. However there are some interesting parallels here between the return to the archaic in the face of the virtual in furniture and a similar response to the post-modern by those who are reviving ancient spiritual practices i.e. LectioDivina, Labyrinth etc. Webber. McLarenetal have advocated such things in the realm of worship/theology and are apparently speaking with same voice as those who critique furniture.
'Table - not merely a utilitarian object but a fascinating and yet still highly functional tool for living.' Mel Byars - The Best Chairs, Tables and Lights (Rotovision 2005)
An interesting comment from a critique on furniture.
Another version of Table Talk from http://www.ccow.org.uk/table_talk.
Table Talk
"Table Talk" is an evolving idea, but the basic vision is this -- to establish a network of "Table Talk" groups where ten or twelve people come together on a regular basis to share a meal, pray and discuss issues that they are facing as they seek to follow Christ in a global context.
At the Table Talk meetings we've had thus far, the meals have been simple but the conversations have been deep and wide-ranging . . . and the sense of support has been a real blessing.
An interesting Table Church practice which is to be found at:http://www.peacechurch.org.uk/about/tabletalk/
Table Talk
Table Talk is a figment of the Birmingham community in particular, inspired by ideas from friends of the community, but seems to be gaining a larger amount of interest from elsewhere all the time.
In essence, Table Talk is an animated community discussion on a chosen subject over a delicious meal. At each meal we have a guest who is a scholar, expert or authority of some description on the subject at hand.
Table Talk is not an after dinner speech. It is a conversation, a discussion and a dialogue, with our guest expert as an authority, a facilitator and a guide through the subject at hand.
HOW WE'VE DONE IT The meal is always set in someone's house. That's where we gather as a faith community, that's the point of connection with the communities we live in, that's where our faith is lived and experienced, so that's where we wrestle with our faith in public.
Usually we've started the conversation with our guest giving us a 5-minute thumbnail sketch of the subject, the general and/or historical positions on the issues and outlining their particular angle on it.
We've often had a few questions to create a structure and direction for the discussion, but those are frequently passed over as the conversation takes a path of its own. Often, though, there's someone who has the overall responsibility of keeping the conversation developing and averting discussions from going in circles, if possible.
We've had two basic understandings:
No question is too simple Usually the simplest question is the one that really gets to the heart of the matter.
No question is too heretical Table Talk is a safe place where any question can be asked in the search for truth. If you can't ask it anywhere else, here you can.
Numbers are quite crucial to get right. We've had anything from 8 to 18 people. Different numbers of people give different dynamics: smaller groups are often more intimate and give more chance for everyone to talk, but can make people for exposed or intimidated by the expectation to participate; larger groups often have a real buzz, there's usually a greater diversity of views and those who feel overwhelmed tend to find it easier to be a passenger if the need to, but they can result in just the gregarious and vocal individuals talking and others being marginalised a little. Both extremes are good for different reasons; both have their drawbacks. And something in between isn't necessarily preferable either. It's just something we've had to get a feel for each time. It is basically limited by the number of places around the table.
Food is important - we've tried to share the responsibility so no-one gets overburdened. We've always had quite a feast and some good wine usually helps to get the conversations flowing.
SUBJECTS AND TOPICS We've always tried to pick a good one - something that's going to be challenging, stimulating, deep and frequently controversial. Topics so far include:
Universalism
Divinely ordained violence in the Bible and the nature of God
The non-violent atonement
Shalom: putting the secret of the universe to the test
Years ago, Paul Roberts said something that has always stuck with me, " you can tell the size of a person's Christianity by the size of their table."After almost 20 years I have not been able to shake that thought, not a week goes by that I don't think about it.
There is something very revealing in these words of Jesus, "Those who receive you receive me, and those who receive me receive the One who sent me." — Matthew 10:40
There is a profound element of divine mystery in hospitality. It's not" me "...I just make myself available and participate in God's hospitality. God loves the weary traveler and provides for the vulnerable. God gives the lonely a home and offers all the misfits, the righteous, the sinner, the thief, the traitor, the poor, the oppressed and the unloved a place at an abundant table. Hospitality has to do with a disposition of Love and Grace. It has far more to do with a heart that is overflowing with generosity and gratefulness...than the quality of the space, and quantity of food.
It is difficult to read the gospels and miss how " table hospitality " is woven throughout. From the opening pages, when Jesus ate at Matthews house with the other tax collectors in which the Pharisees asked the disciples why Jesus ate with the likes of tax collectors and sinners...to the two followers he ate with in Emmaus after his resurrection...to cooking fish on a beach campfire after the boys decided to go back to their old jobs. In the table hospitality that Jesus lived out, he challenged cultural assumptions about who is welcome, giving a glimpse to the reality of His Kingdom. All to often our hospitality is something else, comfort and coziness...inviting the friends we like...who may just return the invitation. Jesus seemed to stretch the size of the table telling us to invite those least like us, the ones who seem least likely to reciprocate. Because we are outside our comfort zone, table hospitality means first, inviting the Spirit of God into the mix. We discover what table hospitality looks like when we " dwell in the life of Jesus."
Food, people, conversation...and the Spirit of God that hovers over the table as in the beginning of creation...something mysterious happens. Listening is always involved in hospitality. The most gracious attempts we can muster are meaningless if we do not actually hear the stranger. Listening is the core meaning of hospitality. It is something we can give anyone and everyone, including ourselves. It takes only a few minutes to really listen.
Hospitality is a way to counter the thousands of times another human being has felt less than human because others didn't listen. Listening is the power of hospitality; it is what makes hospitality the life-giving thing it is.
Stories, life's journeys and struggles, weaving our story into God's story and just the struggles of being a stumbling pilgrim on a journey of faith provide a context into which the reality of real community is formed.
Each individual in a community needs to relocate themselves into the holistic practice of hospitality. It is to easy to opt out and default to the idea that it is a special gift given only to a special few. The real life depends on a community that embodies hospitality as its deepest commitment and value.
Are there strangers in your community...not sure. Look around after the gathering on Sunday or mid-week, and see who leaves without talking to no one. I know, it's easy to assume well maybe they don't want to talk to anyone. But try asking them for lunch, dinner, breakfast...or even coffee. We must understand that our seemingly small efforts are apart of God's larger work. Community must be grounded in the wisdom of hospitality...of not randomly bumping into one another...but of living alongside, lives connected together.
Look at hospitality as that little mustard seed of faith...it is something we do in small increments of daily faithfulness. Hospitality is much less about grandiose and dramatic gestures than it is about...Love, Grace, Prayer., .and the Spirit of God moving in the midst of it all. How often in the divine mystery of hospitality we find blessing for both host and guest.
Another useful background article gleaned from the Internet. The page no longer seems to exist so I am unable to credit it. However the material seemed worth including.
Community...How Big is Your Table?
"Hospitality is a way of life fundamental to Christian identity. Its mysteries, riches, and difficulties are revealed most fully as it is practiced." — Christine Pohl
"Hospitality means inviting the stranger into our private space, whether that be the space of our own home or the space of our personal awareness and concern. And when we do so, some important transformations occur. Our private space is suddenly enlarged; no longer tight and cramped and restricted, but open and expansive and free." — Parker Palmer
Creating community is not something that just happens. Placing a group of people of different gender, cultures, language, theological beliefs and interests into a building, hoping there will be some interaction like molecules in a test tube in which the final product is community...is a pipe dream. It's nothing more than a gathering, like-particles, people with the same interests may attract one another forming a bond and stick, while at the end, the rest disperse into space.
For real community to happen, hospitality...must be a living reality. Hospitality must be a value that is spliced into the DNA of the community. I would even go as far as saying...you can't have one with out the other.
An entry from Mark Berry's 'Way Out West' blog that caught my attention and I felt needed recording so that it could be added to the conversation.
I came across this quote on the web site of "St Benedict's Table" a community in Winnipeg... they say...
At the dawn of the first dark ages, Benedict arose with a vision for community. He did it almost by accident; or is that by providence? Disillusioned by the world of academia in what was looking to be an increasingly threatened and decayed Roman society, Benedict dropped out of school and left town. He went into the wilderness, found himself a quiet cave, and prepared to spend a life simply listening in prayerful silence for the voice of God. The thing is, they wouldn't leave him alone. First by the ones and twos, and eventually by the hundreds, other young men went out to that wilderness place to sit with Benedict and to seek God in the silence. So many, in fact, that he had to give some structure to their common life, eventually producing the "Rule of St Benedict" that governed community life in a rhythm of prayer, work, hospitality, learning, feasting and fasting. Balance. Boundaries. Safety. Accountability. The communities which continued to be formed around this Rule long after his death kept alive a model - an alternative model - for human life in very, very dark times. He seems a good mentor for us in these changing times, doesn't he? And the table? Our life is formed around the communion table, and nurtured over various tables of hospitality and conversation. Most obviously there is the coffee table at the back of our worship space, but there are also all those tables in cafes and pubs and restaurants and homes where community is built, faith shared, questions asked.
It never ceases to amaze and encourage me that communities all over the globe seeking to exist and engage in a changing/post-christian culture find a resonance in common themes... in spiritual even monastic rhythms, in eating together, in hospitality, in creativity, in history, in connections, but these communities do not seem to desire separation from the world, far from it these "rules and rhythms" have arisen out of a desire to be incarnate in the world.
The question arises as to whether conviviality is confined to the privatised family meal or can it be achieved when eating out in company (family or otherwise)? Of course for the majority of the guests a dinner party is the equivalent of eating out even though it takes place in someone's home. But what about the situation in the neutral venue of an eatery.
